It was so nice out yesterday that I drove to Z’s school—she had afternoon practice—with the windows down and the sunroof open. Actually, it was at most sixty, and sort of on the chilly side, but I’m so ready for winter to be done. It’s been tough enough the last few months. I mean, pandemic. Add in: Putin. I didn’t even mind the minor traffic jam, the messy rush of cars, the dozens of parents also on pick-up duty.
The crawl into the parking lot was further complicated by the swarm of middle schoolers, who were (understandably) also excited by the warm weather, totally uninterested in the cars navigating around (and for) them, and generally having the kind of fun that comes so naturally at that age. What, after all, do they have to worry about? Then again. They’ve had a tough few years.
I thought about my childhood and theirs. I thought about the big differences. Some of them were shocking. Including the demographics. When I was growing up, almost zero of my classmates weren’t white and Christian. And here, in front of me, in suburban southwest Ohio, the diversity was incredible. Racially, ethnically, religiously. This is the America F, Z, and R are growing up in.
This is the America I’m supposed to guide them through.
I’ve been a stepdad for just over a year now, and what a year it’s been. As in, there was that aforementioned plague. For all of those twelve months (plus). That’s not to mention the other uglinesses—for example, an attempted insurrection at the U.S. Capitol, which would’ve been beyond my imagination even a few years ago. And now, in the last week, Putin’s devastating invasion of Ukraine.
I know F, Z, and R are thinking about it; on at least a few occasions, I’ve even been asked if this means World War III. Some of us might be tempted to dismiss such questions, but they speak to something real. And worrying. Which all of us are feeling. Of those dozens of kids outside Z’s middle school, no doubt some of them have family members who’ve served, or are serving. Maybe they’ll serve in the future.
No doubt some of them are Ukrainian and are affected, directly or indirectly. Probably some of them are Russian, and may have to deal with stigmas and stereotyping that many American Muslims understand all too well. Others may be relocated from conflict regions; in fact, Z told me of a friend whose parents fled a war in the Balkans in the 1990s. For them, the resonances must be especially challenging.
What I mean to say is, this hits many people in many different ways.
Of course, I have no idea how the conflict in Ukraine will unfold, but there’s ample reason for alarm. If Putin’s army does get bogged down, the war gets much uglier—fast. If he conquers Ukraine, how does he hold onto a country of 44 million? The consequences will be with us for a long time. They will shape the world these kids grow up in. The opportunities and limitations they’ll operate under.
On top of that, they’ll have to navigate this world as Americans, yes, but specifically as Americans of Muslim faith and Pakistani ancestry, whose grandparents were immigrants. And that’s the hardest part of this moment to make sense of. It’s vital for all Americans, old and young, to understand what’s happening now. It’s especially vital for American Muslim kids to understand what’s unfolding before us.
Because of what will happen to all of us. And because of what we can do—for all of us.
Because we are, at the end of the day, Americans.
It’s true that we are likely in for tough times, coming on top of tough times—like the COVID pandemic, not to mention other crises. We, as Americans, will need to make sacrifices. Not on the order Ukrainians are making, and will continue to have to, but we also have a lot on the line, immediately and potentially. After all, NATO shares a very long border with Ukraine.
And while NATO is an arrangement for mutual defense, we all know NATO is made possible by the United States. There wouldn’t be a NATO without us. It is, of course, good for our security, as well as our economic prosperity. It empowers us, enriches us, and ennobles us. But not only us. Given who Putin’s revealed himself to be, there possibly also wouldn’t be an independent Poland, or Hungary, or Bulgaria, without us.
Our military umbrella ensures the freedom of many countries and many peoples.
But that’s where the story gets messy. Why is an increasingly diverse America defending nations who marginalize, demonize, and brutalize people who aren’t of the same color, creed, or culture? When we talk to our kids about this conflict, about the vital role America plays in defending the free world (and the real ways we often come up very short), we must be honest about all the ways the free world comes up short.
Not so that we abandon Ukraine, shrug off Europe, or ignore the West. We are of the West, need the West, and would be far poorer and less safe without it.
But so that we can do better. We must stand up for the West. We must stand up to Islamophobes. And we must make it clear that the two go hand-in-hand.
And to be clear, there’s plenty to stand up to.
In the past week, Bulgaria’s American-educated Prime Minister, Kiril Petkov, went on record with nakedly racist, classist, and Islamophobic language about refugees. Hungary’s Prime Minister, Viktor Orbán, pretends he’s only really concerned with Muslim immigration to Europe from the Middle East1—incidentally, his ancestors are not indigenous to Europe but hey, racism’s always dumb—also guess what?
I’m pretty sure he hates all Muslims. Just pretends (not very well) not to. Ask him about the genocide of Muslims in Bosnia not far from his country, and I bet you you’d hear nothing. No, wait—not nothing. He actually embraces, and financially supports, the radical Serb nationalists who not only deny the genocide of Bosnian Muslims but seem likely to bring about conditions for a similar scenario in the near future.
Here’s a picture of him with Milorad Dodik.
Who’s Milorad Dodik, you ask? In his own words:
Not just a deception, but “the greatest deception.”
That’s not even to get into Poland, or other Eastern European countries, and the shockingly frequent and unabashed animus against Islam, Muslims, Roma, refugees, people of color—and so on, and so forth—in their political conversations. Incidentally, there’s also a French Presidential election coming up, and for a long time, this thoughtful future statesman was dominating the field.
A lot of these wonderful people were cozying up to Putin as late as last week, when suddenly they woke up and realized that the Syrian refugees fleeing Putin’s war machine weren’t the existential threat to them and their freedom, but the war machine, which had been massing next door over the last few months. I guess it took Putin bombarding mostly white Christians for them to realize he’s not a nice guy.2
Before that, slap his face on a t-shirt! Take his money!
These are actual things actual European politicians who are now condemning Putin once proudly and openly did. The geopolitical ignorance is shocking. The privilege is astonishing. And the gall is nothing short of infuriating.
But as of this week, they’re all but clamoring for America to come and save them.3 For American money. For American troops. For American lives. Don’t get me wrong. I believe we should have a strong relationship with Europe. I believe NATO is a good thing (even if sometimes NATO makes bad choices—still, don’t abandon it, improve it.) I believe there should be a global fraternity of democracies.
I believe we should support Ukraine (in a serious and thoughtful way).
I also believe Vladimir Putin is dangerous. I further believe a Chinese-Russian axis is a threat to the world. I’m with the Liberal Patriot on rethinking American economic, military, and political priorities, to realize a “free world 2.0.” That’s not all that I believe. I also believe Islam is a global, universalist faith, that has iterations which might equally call the Middle East or the Midwest home.
That is: Islam is a European (and American) religion, too. (I wrote about this in greater detail for Quartz. It might be helpful to share with your kids, especially if they’ve seen the racist and Islamophobic vitriol coming out of the far right.)
I also believe my wonderful country is, or rather should be, and aspires to be, a country of its citizens, a nation founded on values and ideals, not colors or creeds. That’s what America is supposed to be and is America at its best. And my country is the security backstop for a lot of other countries, which in principle I don’t have a problem with. Do you know what I do have a problem with?
Viktor Orbán’s a short-sighted bigot. I’m not entirely sure what to do with that, frankly, except to say this: He should be more uncomfortable with his bias than I am. Because he needs us. He obviously preferred Trump to Biden, but imagine if Trump was President now. When Ukraine needed help, what did the Donald do? A: Ask Zelensky to dig up dirt on Hunter Biden.
He turned a country fighting for its national life into an unethical campaign stunt.
Trump doesn’t want the West we want. He would have walked away from it. He did walk away from it. The Bulgarians, the Poles, the Hungarians—their governments should be glad Joe Biden is President right now. But guess what comes with the territory? Biden ran with Kamala Harris, who’s the daughter of a Jamaican and Indian immigrant. Our current Secretary of Defense is a retired African-American general.
Biden’s accomplished a whole lot on his own, but he’s also President because of, among others things, President Barack Hussein Obama and Rep. Jim Clyburn.
Black men. One of partly Muslim ancestry.
Many of the governments of our putative NATO allies seem to believe people of color are culturally incompatible with the West. At least they loudly announced that until they realized that it was a white Christian supremacist who was in fact raining missiles down on their neighbors—and that a pluralistic, diverse America was their last, best, and only hope for remaining free and democratic.
We stand now at a hinge moment of history.
In Two Billion Caliphs, I argue that the era of unrestricted globalization is at an end. The West and the rest will increasingly diverge. It’s happening before our very eyes. We are waking up to the epic mistake that was outsourcing our security and prosperity to authoritarian regimes that do not share our values. We have to prepare ourselves, and our kids, for the hard decisions that must follow.
Hard, yes. But also right. They should feel empowered to have that conversation. To be part of that dialogue. But they must ask hard questions of our side too. They are also the West, after all. As Americans, they are in fact at the heart of the West. And remember all those other kids outside that middle school? They’re the new America that is coming to prominence. They’re the future core of the West.
I want all of them to assert their right to be part of discussions with global implications. I want F, Z, and R to know that just as they should work hard to make sure America is fair and decent, that they should also work hard to make things better for everyone in the West, including Western Muslims. White. Black. Brown. That they don’t have to reject alliances to expect better of ourselves and our allies.
Islamophobia isn’t acceptable, here or abroad, but if it’s American Muslims saying it, that carries an entirely different gravity. That’s unfair, I know, but it’s also reality. And reality is a test, which reveals our character. Given a lot, do we say, “How can I pay it forward?” Did the Bulgarian Prime Minister see Syrian refugees and think of his own country’s journey, from Soviet satellite puppet to European democracy?
Did he think of his own education at Harvard and wonder what others could accomplish if they had the opportunity to freely compete to realize their potential?
Or did he slam the door shut behind him?
Sometimes the hard choices are about confronting evil at the gates. Sometimes the hard choices are about confronting the injustices inside the walls.
We can and must do both.
I want our kids to know that if Muslims of similar profile did better in some countries and worse in others, that it’s not because of some essentialist quality, but because of who they are, where they are, what they want, and how they’re received. Whether they were given a chance or not. Take this one: My grandmother didn’t know the precise day when she was born. Her son was a surgeon. And I’m here, telling that story.
Maybe that doesn’t interest the Islamophobes who had so much to say up until last week. Maybe it should.
Which is itself offensive, grounded in stereotypes, and problematic for all kinds of reasons, but there’s only so much space in this Substack.
Don’t get me wrong. Ukraine is a very diverse country—Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky is not only Jewish but a native Russian speaker too. (And also a onetime comedian). Meanwhile the Crimea, the peninsular territory Russia annexed by force in 2014, has a long and significant Muslim history. That includes ethnic cleansing and genocide orchestrated by Stalin. I also wrote about that for Quartz.
Except for Milorad Dodik and the radical Serbs, who march practically in lockstep with Russia’s dictator.